Show up, do the work and go home

Read self help books, spit out self help essays

Intro

Happy New Year!

Ah, New Year’s resolutions—the annual tradition of promising ourselves we’ll be better, stronger, fitter and wiser. I used to love making grand plans for how I’d transform my life. But as the years go by, I’ve grown a little… skeptical. More often than not, those big, shiny resolutions have ended up on the same dusty shelf as my unused Headspace membership.

I know I’m not alone. According to a 2023 survey by Forbes Health, only 6% of people stick to their resolutions for a full year. Half of us quit after three months, and by the six-month mark, 80% have given up.

Several days ago, I came across this quote by Coach Christopher Sommer

As a “thinker” and a quitter, this doer attitude feels like it’s speaking directly to me. Maybe it’s the secret sauce I need to actually stick with my resolutions this year.

Showing Up is the Hardest Part

Cold Start

One of my goals this year is to exercise three times a week. (Fun fact: It’s also the top New Year’s resolution in this survey for 1000 U.S adults in 2024 )

But every time before I head to gym, my brain starts creating drama.

“😫 ah i don’t want to change”

“🥶 the weather is freezing outside”

“🫣 my earphones are dead. Are you saying I need to endure 30 minutes on the treadmill OFFLINE?”

The imagined obstacles turn the tiniest tasks into epic challenges, successfully keep me in my warm and cozy home half the time.

Runner’s High

Yet, on the days I manage to overcome the resistance and drag myself to the gym, it’s almost always a five-star experience. Walking on the treadmill, feeling each piece of muscles contract and release, sensing those sweet endorphins kicking in—it’s like someone flips a switch, and suddenly, I’m full of hope and good vibes again.

The best part? I LOOOVE the post-workout stretch. Reconnecting with my body, releasing tension from head to toe, reminds me that I can’t just live in my head all the time. I’ve got a shell to take care of too, and it deserves some love.

Haruki Murakami: What I talk about when I talk about running

So why does it always feel so hard to start, even though it feels amazing once I do?

Imagined Problems > Concrete Problems

The hardest part is actually deciding to go. The obstacles I face beforehand, changing clothes, walking in the cold, boredom, are all imagined fears. In that moment, they seem insurmountable.

But the challenges during the workout, fatigue, boredom, are concrete problems that I can adapt and solve right away. If I’m tired, I slow down. If I’m bored, I increase the incline to step up the game. Concrete problems have solutions, whereas imagined fears just grow bigger the more attention I give them.

Then what should I do with the imagined fears then ? Are they even real?

Emotion, Signal or Noise?

Emotion as Signal

Emotions, I’ve realized, are like clouds in the sky. When they clear, I can see the real problem hiding behind them. For example:

• Anxiety is uncertainty about future. Are my goals clear? Maybe I should break them down further to small actionable steps.

• Frustration signals blocked progress. Am I stuck? Should I seek help, find better resource or tweak my approach?

• Anger is feeling wronged or disrespected. What boundary was crossed? Should I address it directly, set clearer boundaries, or let it go?

When I take a moment to name my emotions and interpret them as signals, they often reveal problems I can tackle.

Emotion as Noise

But not all emotions point to real problems. Sometimes, emotions are just noise, like static on a radio. Thoughts like “I need to change clothes” “weather is too cold” “my earphones are dead” aren’t real issues. They’re just my brain looking for an excuse to stay comfy.

Yoshihiro Togashi, playing games at home

I think back to elementary school, when I used to wake up at 6:30 a.m., dress up, and do morning exercises in the freezing cold. Why? Because the school made us do so. There was no room for negotiation.

Sometimes, self-discipline is about channeling that same no-negotiation mindset. Filter out the noise, and just do it ✔.

The Power of Showing Up

Consistent effort has an exponential effect. Like a tree cycling through seasons, growth and transformation need time to take place.

Recently I saw this in action during a coding bootcamp I attended. The whole program was three months. At the end, there was a graduation ceremony and students talked about their amazing transformations during this journey.

The first two months were gruelling. The constantly error messages, things not working as expected, frustration was there everyday. However, by the third month, they were “getting it”. They could fully express their creativity, contributing to open source projects, participating in hackathons, making apps they were genuinely excited about. They enjoyed coding so much that they couldn’t stop doing it! One student said that he has “found his voice in tech, while before he didn’t have one”.

The secret? They showed up. Every day at 9 a.m., six days a week, shipping 3-4 pull requests and writing detailed end-of-day reports.

That consistent effort transformed each one of them into cracked engineers.

The Power of Going Home

While showing up needs discipline, so does going home. It means knowing when to stop.

I’ve learned this the hard way. I used to push myself with hours-long cardio sessions to “max out” the results. And sure, I maxed out, my immune system, that is. I’d get sick the next day, setting myself back for a week to recover. Progress isn’t about squeezing out every drop of effort in one go. It’s about pacing myself.

Hemingway would stop writing for the day when he knew exactly what would come next in his story.

"The best way is always to stop when you are going good and when you know what will happen next. If you do that every day… you will never be stuck."

Experienced developers will take a walk when they stuck on a bug too long and come back with fresh perspectives.

Consistency beats sporadic bursts of effort every time. Going home ensures we’re ready to show up again tomorrow.

Takeaway

If you want to be part of the 6% who stick with their New Year’s resolutions, remember this simple mantra from Coach Sommers:

no emotions, no dramas.

When you show up, you are facing concrete problems than imagined fears.

When you solve those problems, you level up.

Trust the system and see you in 12 months.